Lemony Snickets?

Tonight, my life resembles a Jim Carrey movie. You may be thinking... ahhh which one...there are SO many good choices. Sadly, no. I'm referring to Lemony Snickets - A Series Of Unfortunate Events. In my opinion, it was the worst movie he's ever made. Yes, I do remember Ace Ventura...but at least THAT was funny.
Anywho. Let me describe my night for you. First, let me say that it is now 5 am, so technically, I should be describing my morning, but since I haven't gone to sleep yet.. we'll still call it night. Ok? Thanks for playing along, kids.
After a nice peppermint bubble bath, I dressed in my circus tent pj's ( as the hubby likes to call them bc they're pink, green, purple, yellow and white striped) and sat talking to the hubby while waiting for him to get ready for bed. We went to bed at about 2am. I **almost** fell asleep and my legs started tingling. I have come to the conclusion that my insomnia is due to Restless Leg Syndrome- a syndrome that I always thought was psychological or to put it bluntly, BS. I'm still leaning that way, but for the sake of argument, let's pretend I'm not crazy tonight...errr ...this morning. So.. I can't sleep. I toss and turn to no avail. I get up to pee, thinking..maybe I have to go and that's what's keeping me awake. How that affects my legs, I haven't a clue, but at this point, I'll try anything. Didn't work. Still awake. I even tried propping my legs up on a pillow. At 4:30 I get out of bed because I have annoyed the husband to the point of exhaustion. Go pee again. Shouldn't have had that last glass of tea. Guess what. My "friend" has come to visit. WTH? It's 4:30 in the fricken morning!! That couldn't have happened during daylight hours? And, by the way, whoever decided to call this curse a "friend" should be shot. At point blank range. With buckshot.
Next, I take care of that business and decide to sleep on the couch so that I don't keep the hubby awake any longer and so the dog will quit making that -aggravated deep breath noise- at me. I bring my pillow and the only extra blanket I can find is my favorite throw, but it's only long enough to cover my feet or my shoulders, but not both at the same time. Curses!! Ok..fine. I'll curl up and be warm. Done. Oh wait. There was something moving in the floor by the couch. WTH? It's a little green frog. We've had a lot of rain lately and I guess he just jumped his happy little a&& right on into the house while the door was open. I hate frogs. They're icky. I grab a paper towel, scoop him up and throw him outside. Paper towel included. I'll have to pick the paper towel up tomorrow while I'm cleaning the rest of the yard. It'll be soggy by then with all this rain. YAY!! I can't wait. Frog is no longer a threat. I lay down on the couch, get all nice and comfy and the tv starts making clicking noises. WTH? It's not even ON!!
It's possessed. I've lost my mind. Oh well. I still can't sleep. So, you see how my night has turned into a series of unfortunate events. Crap. Now I'm hungry. Breakfast at 6am anyone?? I wonder if Pet Detective is on........